Strategies for coping in the new benefice

Hurrah! - The scaffolding around the Rectory has gone! The builders are coming back - but at the moment we are a builder free zone. It's been eleven weeks since we moved from Tavistock and I can honestly say we (and I say WE) have never been so busy. The Rector@6 has survived the Easter services and he has managed to attend 4 of 6 annual general meetings. We have had a host of invitations and, where possible, we try to attend as we want to meet as many people as we can. There are times that we have to say no - and Sunday lunch has proved to be one of those times. I would love to share a Sunday roast but The Rector@6 needs to stop after two services  - and to stop talking - especially if he has a service in the evening.

I have found a lady who needed help with her heavy horses - so I am riding regularly again - and on a shire cross and a Clydesdale. When I left Dartmoor I thought that was the end of riding Clydesdales. Leaving Major, the Clydesdale, was very hard. When I arrived in Dorset, I answered an advert, not knowing what sort of horses I would be helpng with. God certainly moves in mysterious ways! This riding is outside any of the parishes and I find that I am really able to relax because of this. I have yet to commit to activities in the parish.

The Rector@6 is getting to grips with six diverse churches and is attempting to draw them together but, understandably, they want to keep their identity. The question is - how does the Rector@6 reduce his work load? He has a small ministry team - so he is not alone but they can only be stretched so far - however enthusiastic they are. Drawing the churches together has to be a priority and when we have had a joint service, there is a definite sense of optimism.

It's not all rosy - while many are keen to support and help the Rector@6, there have been others who have been waiting for the new rector so that they can address issues that are troubling them. He has had to learn to handle these unexpected telephone calls and not to take some comments personally, as these issues have often been brewing for some months before the Rector@6 arrived. He has found this a difficult side to the work and I have seen him chew over such issues for longer than he should. And then the sermon preparation gets squeezed - and if the sermons are not sorted - the day off is not a day off, as the Rector@6 tends to be preoccupied and not much fun!

Walking is our great escape and, with the better weather, we are finally discovering where we are. We have bought a personalised map which is centred on our village and includes all the parishes. The map is displayed on the loo wall so that we can learn the landscape and contemplate our next walk. The sunshine and clear skies mean that we have been exploring our surroundings and finding those places that are 'awesome'! (We have followed up on useful suggestions from fellow bloggers) We have spotted the first bluebells in the ancient woods that fill the landscape and we will soon be surrounded by seas of bluebells. We see deer regularly and yesterday  I saw a tiny fawn in the undergrowth while I was out riding. The deer tend to stay still when I ride rather than run off as they do when I am walking. We are learning to look and see the beauty of the diverse countryside that surrounds us. There are ancient woodlands and sandy pathed forests. There are vast flint ladened fields and acres of pastures. There are miles of well signposted footpaths and bridleways to explore. I missed the sea when we first moved to Dartmoor - now I miss the moor but through the camera lens, I am learning to look with fresh eyes and the landscapes are opening up their splendour.

Sunsets and Sunrises

Our room with a view.

I seem to have become the 'silent rector's wife' and have lost my writing voice for the moment. I think the Rector@6 and I are experiencing such a roller coaster journey at the moment, that I need time to reflect before I record my thoughts. One moment our life is full of sunrises and excitement for new opportunities and the next, we seem to have a run of sunsets as things close down and opportunities do not fulfil their promise. Everyone must experience this when they move to an unknown area and each day, the Rector@6 and I venture out in different directions to glean more knowledge about our area. I do find it a lonely process at times - while the Rector@6 has the opposite experience of having to meet so many new people at so many different occasions. I am wary of jumping into things with both feet and, already, I am glad that I have been wary but soon I must take the plunge and make some firm commitments. But everything is so new - every person, place or journey is new. And that is stressful.

I am missing the sense of 'awe and wonder' that I experienced on Dartmoor and, before that, living next to the sea. I have yet to find that place where I feel refreshed and can marvel at the greatness of God. It is when I stand looking out to a huge grey sea that no man can master - or look at the huge boulders stacked on top of one another, forming a precipitously balanced Tor in the bleak open moorland, that I feel a sense of God and a sense of how minute my problems really are.


There are these places here, I'm sure, and we will find them - when we have the time to explore. For now, I must continue to live in the present and take pleasure from things that are much closer to home such as the glorious primroses that are scattered in their hundreds all over our back garden. Even on the grey days, they seem to smile. And the view of the village church silhouetted by wonderful sunsets that we can see from our sitting room. And, of course, there is Tess - the eternal optimist - to keep us on the right tracks!
 

Sunset on a good life.

As the snow is gently blowing in the wind, The Rector@6 is digging the last resting place for our sixteen year old lakeland dog - Jem. She came to us on Palm Sunday all those years ago and has been the most challenging of dogs to own! Miss Independent had a very strong sense of survival and she could be very fierce as a young dog - a troublesome dog who seemed to laugh at life and resented other dogs who got in her way. We would have rehomed her in the early years but we feared that she would end up being put down - and she didn't deserve that. She has travelled many miles with us and has lived in the last four houses. I am so glad that she came here with us and now adds to our history in this house.

We had rushed Jem to the vets on Easter Saturday evening and we thought the decision would be made then. We prepared ourselves but she walked into the vets and walked out with us again fifteen minutes later! We knew that she was in her last weeks but even this morning she was out of bed and walked to the post office with me - but the symptoms of an internal tumour were increasing and we had to make the sad decision this afternoon after consulting the vet once more. Her last resting place is under a new apple tree appropriately called 'Sunset'.We do miss her.

A Very Busy Easter

Never have a baptism on Easter Sunday The Rector@6 was told by colleagues when he was in training. (Despite being biblical, it is usually too busy with services.) So first Easter after training - what does he do - he has an infant baptism on Easter Sunday. And what a joy it was! The sun shone and the little village church was absolutely packed - not only with the Easter congregation, the baptism party but also visitors from far and wide who were staying in holiday rentals or with relatives. In fact the whole weekend has been a joy!

Good Friday and Easter Saturday followed the pattern of previous years with excellent Easter garden construction by the children in two of the villages. There had been activites from stone painting to chocolate nest making and egg hunts arranged by members of the clergy and lay team. It was lovely to see so many children confidently busying themselves around the churchyard and having fun. There was also a reflective hour at the cross for adults with music and readings which The Rector@6 and I could attend together.

Easter day started with a Book of Common prayer communion service in the church that was just a mile up the road. With the clocks changing, it was an early start for us but not as early as the last year's sunrise service in Devon. The drive along the country lane was full of spring promise - the hard overnight frost was beginning to thaw but still added a sparkle to fence posts and gates as they were caught by the sun. An early egret was disturbed from the stream that runs along the lane and lazily rose up into the air in a brillant white streak. The car was full of primroses for the congregation to take home after the service. The church only has three tolling bells - but they were expertly rung by the sidesman, in a series of patterns that were lively and inviting. Sixteen hardy soles made it to this service and it was good to see them.

I drove The Rector@6 (still in cassock and surplice) back to the village church. It is such a shame that he cannot stay and talk to new faces when there are other churches waiting for his services. He arrived in time to talk to the baptism party and for extra hymn books (borrowed from the other church) to be given out. The newly created children's area was already in use and the overflow chairs full! The baby behaved, The children who helped with the sermon - cooperated willingly (and were not just chocolate egg bribed!) and people sang enthusiastically. The organist scooped up her student daughter on the way back from communion and they sang beautifully (all unplanned) during communion as there was rather a long queue of people. After the service there was a primrose for each family to take with them as a reminder of the Easter message. The holiday visitors were thrilled and amazed that our small village church could be so vibrant and alive in sleepy rural Dorset and tell us that they will be returning next year. A few villagers who don't normally come to church but had just come to see the new vicar - have also said they will be back. But what will they find next time? The reality is trying to keep these small village churches in the centre of the rural community and alive.

Happy Easter

Past, present and future

We've been out of the valley! The Rector@6 was summoned to Salisbury Cathedral for the 'Eucharist of the Chrism and Reaffirmation of Vows' on Maundy Thursday. I'll be honest and say that this wasn't my idea of a fun day out but it was a chance to get a lift to Salisbury. This was a 'must attend service' - unless The Rector@6 had a very, very good excuse. I, on the other hand had a choice - shops or Cathedral? I am so glad that I chose to go to the Cathedral. I sat looking up the vaulted ceiling and listened to all the praise and prayer being lifted to the roofs - as it had been for so many years in the past. Seeing all the clergy - the deacons, the priests and the bishops process through the cathedral was very moving. I am brought into the present when I see The Rector @6 pass by. How different from the six small rural churches that I will usually see him. What an unexpected place I find myself now in!

Palm Sunday and The Donkey didn't make it.

We were reminded today that The Rector@6 and I have been here 6 weeks now. My blogging is still on the back burner as we are just so busy. This job of the Rector's involves so much talking - even for me! Everyone and everything is new - and that comes with hidden stresses. I am constantly asking myself if I should know the person's name? Have we spoken before? I have taken to answering just 'yes thank you' to the most frequent question of "Have you settled in yet?" We do still have boxes and builders - but perhaps they will just become permanent fixtures.

One of the problems of taking over a benefice just before Easter, is that many of the traditional services have been put in place by the 'holding' team. So plans for Holy Week, Palm sunday, Easter Sunday and Maundy Thursday carry the format that they always have done - but, of course The Rector@6 does not know this format. Palm Sunday was to involve a procession and a donkey in our village. Quite where they process or when (before or after the service) all had to be discovered. Where was the donkey to wait? Who picks up the poo (before someone complains)? What was the purpose - when the readings this year, do not mention a donkey - but refer to a colt - which is, of course, a male horse?

It has been wet and bitterly cold lately and, by chance, we happen to be on good terms with the lady who owns the donkey.We got the first inkling that things may not go to plan when The Rector@6 received a phone call the day before, from the donkey's owner, to say that her horse was probably about to foal and she may be otherwise occupied - as well as not being very well herself. A command decision was needed here as the donkey had to be cleaned up, boxed and trailed to the village - all in time for the 10.30 service on Sunday morning. So, at the risk of disappointing those who were only coming to church to see the donkey, - The Rector@6 cancelled the donkey. Such are the important decisions he has to make! And the foal did arrive in the middle of the night and the vet had to be called (mother and son doing well!) so it turned out to be the correct decision. There were a couple of disappointed children but some of us were secretly relieved that we were not going to trail behind the donkey in the bitterly cold wind! Coffee and a good chat seemed a very suitable substitution! I never thought I would be involved in stage managing a donkey - life does throw up some unexpected challlenges at the moment.

This is church number four. It was the old large key of this church that was used symbolically in The Rector's installation service - and it was this key that The Rector then put down and misplaced for 24 hours. The church has some beautiful stone carvings with song birds and foliage and an owl high above the pews. These are the designs of Thomas Hardy (author) as he worked for the firm that restored the church before he became well known as a writer.