Tuesday 16 April 2013

Sunsets and Sunrises

Our room with a view.
I seem to have become the 'silent rector's wife' and have lost my writing voice for the moment. I think the Rector@6 and I are experiencing such a roller coaster journey at the moment, that I need time to reflect before I record my thoughts. One moment our life is full of sunrises and excitement for new opportunities and the next, we seem to have a run of sunsets as things close down and opportunities do not fulfil their promise. Everyone must experience this when they move to an unknown area and each day, the Rector@6 and I venture out in different directions to glean more knowledge about our area. I do find it a lonely process at times - while the Rector@6 has the opposite experience of having to meet so many new people at so many different occasions. I am wary of jumping into things with both feet and, already, I am glad that I have been wary but soon I must take the plunge and make some firm commitments. But everything is so new - every person, place or journey is new. And that is stressful.
I am missing the sense of 'awe and wonder' that I experienced on Dartmoor and, before that, living next to the sea. I have yet to find that place where I feel refreshed and can marvel at the greatness of God. It is when I stand looking out to a huge grey sea that no man can master - or look at the huge boulders stacked on top of one another, forming a precipitously balanced Tor in the bleak open moorland, that I feel a sense of God and a sense of how minute my problems really are.


There are these places here, I'm sure, and we will find them - when we have the time to explore. For now, I must continue to live in the present and take pleasure from things that are much closer to home such as the glorious primroses that are scattered in their hundreds all over our back garden. Even on the grey days, they seem to smile. And the view of the village church silhouetted by wonderful sunsets that we can see from our sitting room. And, of course, there is Tess - the eternal optimist - to keep us on the right tracks!
 

8 comments:

  1. It sounds like you're going through a difficult adjustment period, Harriet and I do feel for you both. It's very early days yet and I pray that you will find things opening up for you over the coming months, as you gget to know people and places better.

    Gosh, hasn't Tess grown!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's getting better - which is why Ive been so slow to reply!

      Delete
  2. I was advised not to commit myself for a year! It's a bit like not digging up a new garden until you have seen it in all seasons - only once you've seen the church calendar round can you really appreciate how a particular role shapes up.

    Praying for wisdom for you both x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. wise words - although I don't think I can wait a year.

      Delete
  3. Whatever you do, don't let yourself be 'dragooned' into running anything, or at least not until you're absolutely sure it's the right thing for you. Congregations can still have a very bad habit of expecting the Vicar/Rector's wife to be the unpaid curate, and to do all the things that are seen as 'woman's work' (eg MU Enrolling Member, Tea Rota Organiser, possibly Sunday School coordinator et al). The wife of one of our previous Vicars was (& still is, even though they've officially retired) a total live wire and ran absolutely everything (because she could and enjoyed doing it), but when they left it was extremely difficult to find anyone to do the jobs, and there was a horrible hiatus - and the next incumbant's wife absolutely refused to take over, quite rightly, as she had different gifts and was involved with things outside the immediate parish circle. Rural parishes, I have to say, are worse in expecting things to be done for them, on the whole, than urban ones - it's 'tradition', I'm afraid. Has Rector@6 got any lay ministers (Readers, Communion assistants, parish visitors, etc) to help him?
    We know Dorset very well - if we can point you in the direction of places to go for 'refreshment', please do get in touch - Perpetua can give you my e-mail address, as I'm not blogging myself yet. One suggestion, if it's not too far away, is Hillfield Friary (north of Dorchester, near Batcombe, and not far from Cerne Abbas). Highly recommended - it saved my sanity at a very difficult time when I was living on the Hampshire/Dorset border.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you - we have taken your advice and investigated Hillfield Friary - it certainly looks interesting. It also got us out to visit the Cerne Abbas giant - so thank you.

      Delete
  4. Life is strange. I found you, then I lost you, and now I have found you again. Strange.

    I do hope you and the Rector find wonderful times in this portion of your journey. I've officially "retired" from ministry, but I keep being called upon to help. So I've got some things to do.

    Blessings and Bear hugs!
    Bears Noting

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great to have that you have found me! We are always appreciative of comments from those who have been in ministry - you know what it can be like!

      Delete